Insight: Behind my eyelids (another ascension poem)

meditation planter

inbreath when instructing myself to sit and not do

the mind in pictures which flash, fade, emerge

a dog head beelines for my palm and nuzzles bumping cool damp nose bud

palms cupping buzz that tingles

feeling the light prickling where fate line intersects heart and head

waiting for what emerges

what is showing today?

the filmstrip inside my skull splices a never-ending collection of plants

I clearly perceive flowers, leaves of all shapes and colors

they keep coming at me, to me

how do I know them so well?

how do they know me?

in the library that lives in my cellular memory

have I stored and cataloged my interactions with these beings?

Am I a librarian, a botanist, herbalist, healer, a witch?

And why am I so reluctant to remember?

Having loved the plants so long, so well…

has this power brought upon me isolation, demise, misery among men?

remembering is awakening

there is fear, post-traumatic tension with excitement braided in

so many of us with herbs and weeds behind our eyelids

were martyred to human need for certainty, control, designations of good and evil

now insight is returning

as are balance, divinity of female and male

squeezing bitter drops of toxic neediness from each polarization

eager to relax and embrace myself and the plants inside of my eyes

Animal logic: interpreting aberrant behavior

romantic squirrels

Dearest readers,

For the last two years, an otherwise ordinary-looking squirrel has been targeting very specific plants in my porch flower containers and viciously and systematically shredding the plants until nothing remains but the stub of a root. This creature, whom I have dubbed “Psycho Squirrel”, does not eat the plants. He, and I am assuming, perhaps erroneously, based on his deliberate and aggressive yet sneaky behavior, that he is a male, has occasionally garlanded my wooden fence with shreds of geraniums.

vintage squirrel illustration

Squirrels are supposed to be repelled by geraniums.

My initial response to this squirrel’s erratic behavior was to feel upset and even a bit angry. I love all animals, but I was having difficulty feeling affection for his less than lovable behavior.

squirrel

When people on my local neighborhood social network regularly vent about package thieves and other nefarious individuals who delight in petty crimes and burglaries in our area, their reactions, while more heated and intense than my response to my rodent visitor, reminded me of my own thoughts about package thieves and such.

Matt Squirrell

Generally, humans are very protective of their property, their belongings, and they become quite angry and aggressive when their territory is invaded. Sending unconditional love to these perpetrators is outside of the realm of most people’s experience and ability.

squirrel meme.jpg

Since I spend much of my time and energy focusing on raising my energetic frequency and working towards unity and coherence in my body, mind, heart, and energy field, the behavior of this erratic, fluffy-tailed being intrigued me. Perhaps he is not a simple ne’er-do-well bent on tearing up flowers. Perhaps he is a messenger from Gaia (Mother Earth), and his actions have been misinterpreted by me. Perhaps I need to send him (and our relationship) unconditional love despite the vegetation decimation in which he seems to delight.

potato weed parable

 

As a gardener on this third density realm of experience, I struggle with the concept that some plants (people, animals, trees) are considered more valuable, more important than others. In my heart of hearts, all beings are conscious and have specific talents, properties, beauty, and energy. No being is more important than another, no matter how humble in appearance.

Wicked_Plants

Some people say a “weed” is a plant that is the wrong place. Perhaps a plant becomes named a “weed” when it is perceived by a lower density being, by a state of consciousness that divides, confines, compartmentalizes, judges. Because we, for the most part, still live in duality while striving for unity consciousness (some of us do!), our gardens are also subject to judgment.

 

The message of the squirrel, as I interpret it, leads me to question my gardening practice. I have written of this dilemma before in this blog. By tearing up my asters this spring, and my geraniums last growing season, the squirrel was destroying the “privileged plants”, who get to live in containers on the porch, with lovely store-bought soil, compost, and plant food. The wild plants, of which there are a great variety who propagate themselves  throughout my front and back yard – and the types of plants also vary to some degree from year to year – are not allowed, for the most part, to live in the designated flower beds or containers.

plants in containers

And while I regret doing it, I do pull up certain plants to favor others. I do not resort to using poisons of any kind. But think about it! In our human societies, we constantly judge certain people. Put them in categories. Decide that some should be punished, put to death. Some enjoy great privileges, while others constantly struggle to survive. Certain body types and appearances are considered beautiful and desirable, while others are judged ugly and unlovable. I believe that when we live from the heart, these judgmental practices fall away. The heart is a great unifier.

weeds and flowers

This institutional plant racism or segregation does not obey the Law of One. How can I be aligned with my higher self and in service to Gaia and to continue to garden in the old way, with hierarchies of plants, separated beds? Should a New Earth garden be a confusion of weeds and cultivated plants? Areas of intentional planting with other areas left intact? I don’t quite have an answer to this question yet. But the question itself intrigues me. How do we garden in the fifth dimension?

New Earth garden.jpg

I do talk to my plants, to the trees, the stars, the air, water, rocks, and clouds. I apologize to the tiny trees and seedlings which I remove from my yard. Each time I grasp a tiny stem and pull the roots from their hold in the Earth, I feel twinges of sadness. And I know that Nature herself is quite harsh on small trees. Very few reach maturity. Perhaps I am just one of the hazards in the eco-system. Still, to love the plants unconditionally, while loving myself unconditionally is my goal. My intuition tells me that I simply need to listen to the plants more. Sometimes, I ask certain plants if they could please move somewhere else.

listening to plants

In any case, Psycho Squirrel has inspired a thought process and a questioning of how we, as human beings, interact with our natural environment. I feel much improvement to our quality of life in human societies would come if we did slow down and took the time to listen to plants, animals, rocks, the soil, trees, the air, and the clouds. The ability to understand all of creation is inside of each of us. Of that I am certain. We simply need to be still, and to remember.